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Tacky or Tasteful #3…

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The South is a Matriarchal society. There’s a reason our Daddies said, ‘Ask your momma’. For all our feminine clothes and flirting…it’s true y’all, Southern Women are ‘Steel Magnolias’, who rule the roost with an Iron Hand whether the Roost is the size of the Chicken coop or a Big House on a hill. They insisted on- Tradition, Tact and Taste- otherwise their families would erode into Tacky or even worse- Trashy. They knew that classic dressing would last- if you had a Nice Black Dress and a Good White Blouse- you could dress Tastefully whether you had a fortune or lost one.

A whole lot of us, including me, wore a mix of new, homemade and hand-me-down clothing. We were not poor, I just had an older sister. If garments were well made and classic, they stood the test of time. Then there were some who learned the art of Tasteful Fashion by association with friends who had Mothers who insisted that Dressin’ Decent was the right thing to do. It boiled down to self respect and respect for others. I still believe this. I can never forget hearin’ our mommas say– ‘Always leave something to the imagination darlin’

So, to end Fashion Week at Camellia’s Cottage, let’s talk Accessories and more…

  • Pearls
  • A Good Watch
  • A Nice Pocketbook
  • Monograms
  • Sunglasses, Diamond Studs and Lipstick

Some of us come from the school of wearing a Single Strand of Pearls- others like to pile them on! I’m with Chanel who wore ropes and ropes of them! Nothing dresses up the neckline of a blouse or a simple dress like Pearls. Just don’t wear your pearls on your wedding day – my grandmother thought wearing pearls on your wedding day signified a string of troubles! Though that is not a proven fact.

A good Watch, whether it’s Cartier or Timex sets off any outfit casual or dressy. Our mommas wanted us to have a Watch because they expected us to be on time– for school, work and get home when we were supposed to! jackie-kennedy-vintage-cartier-black-turtleneck

A Nice Pocketbook is always a necessity. Let’s face it- if Queen Elizabeth thinks carryin’ a pocketbook is the right thing to do- who’s gonna argue with her? The Fashion Icons carried them too!

Monograms-Give a Southern Woman a blank surface of fabric and we can figure out how to monogram it! Several years ago- I inherited a mink stroller from my friend’s mother – on the inside her name had been monogrammed. In the South, if we ever get a cool snap, we’ll throw on a fur coat- real or faux- with jeans or our finery. However, after inheriting the mink stroller, to be honest I never had the occasion to wear it until our family flew to Montreal one winter– I wore it on the plane. Of course I was burning up! I looked down and saw Sybil’s name monogrammed inside and immediately was horrified thinking- if that plane crashed- they would think Sybil had died all over again! I love monograms.  Monogrammed handkerchiefs, scarves and jewelry are classic.monogrammed-silver-bracelet

A great pair of Sunglasses can take you anywhere! Not only do they stave off cataracts at the beach, but protect the delicate skin around your eyes and are a touch of glamour! The Fashion Icons agree!

Jacqueline Kennedy (1929 – 1994) tours the Harland and Wolff shipyard in Belfast, during a visit to Northern Ireland, 7th September 1970. (Photo by London Daily Express/Getty Images)
Hold onto that thought… because I am about to share some well kept secrets–

Diamond Studs, real or faux, are appropriate for young ladies and the ah…Southern Belles who are aging gracefully. I’ll never forget when chandelier earrings became fashionable- a Southern Mother told her daughter-‘Ruth Anne, the only appropriate place for chandeliers to hang are from the ceiling!‘ The truth is- wearing earrings is fun when  you’re young…but when it comes time to get a job? Listen to the Southern Mothers- ‘Nobody’s gonna hire you if all they notice are those earbobs janglin’ around!’ Wear Diamond studs instead. Now,hang in there with me… Think- Sunglasses, Diamond Studs and Red Lipstick! 

American actress Grace Kelly (1929 – 1982) in a pink wrap, circa 1955. (Photo by Silver Screen Collection/Hulton Archive/Getty Images)
The truth is- Red Lipstick in all of it’s varied shades is the most classic pick of all time– Red Revival from Maybelline™ and. Cherries in the Snow from Revlon™ are all time favorites. Red Revival on the left- Cherries in the Snow on the left. Both have that Hollywood glamour!

 Diamond Studs bring sparkle up higher on your face, actually brighten the eyes and detract from fine lines! For those times when you wouldn’t be caught dead actually getting out of the car but need to scoot to the drive thru window at the bank-Sunglasses and Red Lipstick are a lifesaver. And finally, darlin’ …if you are gonna inflict your bare feet on the general public- please paint those toenails Red!

I can’t resist showing you my ever glamourous friend, Lorrie- she’s worn Red Revival Lipstick for years!morton-tims-event-1-029

Oh, I’ve had so much fun laughing with you during our Fashion Week at Camellia’s Cottage. Don’t be Tacky, be Tasteful in all you do! Of course we’ll never run out of advice from our Southern Mothers!

Love y’all, Camellia

The top photograph is from my friend Paula’s personal collection. The bottom photograph is from my personal collection. Other images are from AOL and may be subject to copyright.

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Alabama Marble…

What do these three handsome men have in common? The man in the middle is Giuseppe Moretti , the sculptor of Birmingham’s Vulcan and the ‘Head of Christ’ which is on display at Vulcan Park after residing at the Alabama Archives and History Building in Montgomery for many years. While Moretti, an Italian immigrant, was working on Vulcan he discovered a treasure trove of marble in Sylacauga, Alabama and sculpted the Head of Christ.Alabama Marble is said to be the whitest marble in the world. Moretti loved working with it more than his native Italian Carrera Marble. The first recorded industry in Alabama was in 1834, which was to quarry marble from Sylacauga, which continues to produce the highly prized marble to this day. m-5120-marble-in-the-1930sMany historic places in Alabama and the United States use this beautiful marble.

  • Courthouses all across the state, the Alabama Capitol Building
  • The Brown Marx Building, Birmingham Trust National Bank
  • The interior of the John Hand Building and countless city halls, privately owned homes and even cemeteries used Alabama Marble.
  • The beautiful Louisiana Supreme Court, the Somerset County Courthouse in New Jersey, the United States Supreme Court interior
  • The Old Chicago Main Post Office, the Alexander Hamilton Custom House in Manhattan, the Dime Savings Bank in Brooklyn, an the Historic City Hall in Philadelphia-

All have Alabama Marble -and that’s not all! Look at the beautiful translucent ceiling in the Lincoln Memorial. What you are looking at is Alabama Marble, glowingly beautiful at night.

Look at Gutzan Borghum’s bust of Lincoln found in the Rotunda of the U.S. Capitol- Borgham said the texture of Alabama Marble allowed him to portray the kindness of Lincoln’s face- something he had never been able to achieve with other types of marble. In the early part of the 21st century, Alabama Marble made a comeback in home interiors-especially kitchens. kitchen-with-alabama-marble

When we began renovation of the kitchen here at Camellia’s Cottage- a large portion of the budget went toward the kitchen. The old kitchen had very little counter space- the new plan was a U shaped countertop- in place of the L shape- with the refrigerators on the opposite wall along with a marble topped sink and coffee station– I had increased the square footage of the countertops by over 25 square feet! Now, the budget could stand only so much stretching- I wanted Alabama Marble, however the cost had gone up.  Alabama Marble was over $120 per sq.ft. as opposed to Italian Carerra Marble which was $90 per sq.ft.- and that was before adding in the cost of countertop removal, installation and taxes!  I made the hard choice to go with Italian Carerra Marble- as representative of the Marble Industry in Alabama. Nothing beats marble for elegance and tradition– it’s also heat resistant and stays cool – a big bonus in a Southern Kitchen!

As you can see, Italian Carerra is not as white as Alabama Marble- however the pale gray went with my overall neutral color scheme. Now, I have to tell you-  the contractors, kitchen designer and others tried to talk me out of getting marble countertops; it is softer than granite- it can stain and the biggest problem is etching. I have to admit that I wanted to keep it showroom perfect at first! It’s sort of like aging folks- when you find that first wrinkle, you sort of panic. I know I did. Marble countertops are not for everyone.

As mine slowly etched, I tried to avoid it, then- I read articles by interior designers who had installed marble countertops in their own kitchens- one said he couldn’t wait until his got some age on it- others said to embrace the etching as part of the patina of age. Another had purposely bought old marble and another said she wanted hers to age so it would look like her grandmother’s kitchen in Italy. So, here I am four years since it has been installed and I have to say- it is like aging, you can either fight it every single day or you can embrace the natural beauty of stages of real life. My kitchen can’t compare with those you see in magazines, but everyday I think of this house which holds so many good memories and the food I prepare for the people I love– none of us are perfect, some of us have aged- Marble is a daily reminder to embrace life’s best moments, to stay true to my roots and love it- to embrace the patina of age.

Love y’all, Camellia

Check out- http://www.encylopediaofalabama.org for more information about Alabama Marble. Images for photographs of Vulcan, Head of Christ, and Giusseppe Moretti and other vintage photographs are from Sylacauga Marble in Wikipedia. The Kitchen photograph is one I saved for my own renovation and is from Birmingham Home and Garden Magazine, I believe. Some may be subject to copyright and if so I will gladly credit these photographs or remove them.

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September Skin Care…

 

‘You’re lookin’ a little dry, darling’…When a friend interrupts you to say that, well it’s time to take a look in the mirror, Cinderella. Actually, when summer ends and September begins… we all may be lookin’ a little dry.  Where is that Ponce de Leon when we need him? He came South looking for the Fountain of Youth and left us with just part of it- Water. Drinking water is one of the easiest and best ways- internally– to keep skin looking good.fountain-of-youth

After years of working in fragrance and cosmetics- I hope you will look at your skincare, makeup and even sunscreen products- if these three are at the top of the list of ingredients:

  • Water
  • Mineral Oil
  • Alcohol

You need to re-think what you are putting directly on your skin. I can just feel y’all running to look at the labels! All three will dry out the skin.  You need to have something as a barrier between the skin and those ingredients. So what to do? The simple answer is this- for aging skin in particular– Our grandmothers were right to clean their complexions with cold cream or even lard. Toss facial soaps and commercial face cleansers unless your skin is very oily. Home remedies– right out of our pantries, may actually be better and healthier for aging skin. Facial skin is delicate and thins as we age. Olive Oil would be my cleanser of choice and a natural barrier between your skin, makeup and even sunscreen– all may contain harsh chemicals. Olive Oil has amazing properties-

  • Packed with good fatty acids
  •  Vitamins and Minerals
  • Absorbs into the Skin quickly with no Residue
  • Has Powerful Antioxidants
  • Helps maintain Elasticity

Now if any of you have underwear with the elastic waistband stretched out…well you get the picture. Aging skin gets fine lines, is crepe-y and sags. I know, it’s depressing. Nourishing it with Olive Oil is a good start.

Soybean Oil is another good option-it also absorbs into the skin quickly and while it doesn’t have the power of Olive Oil- it does contain Plant Based Estrogen which is another good thing for aging skin. Mix the two together and you have a very good makeup remover and all purpose face and body product. Besides, it’s biblical to anoint yourself with oil!

Now- as skin ages, it doesn’t renew as quickly- so if we can give it a little help with exfoliation– the skin will look better almost immediately. Let me tell you a little story…I had a customer years ago- who was in her early 70’s, she obviously could buy any products- she bought $250 bottles of fragrance without batting one of her adorable eyelashes; but she never bought our face and body products. She had beautiful skin. She would just politely decline, as any refined Southern Lady knows how to do.

I couldn’t stand it…curiosity was killing this cat. One day I asked her what she used on her beautiful skin- She told me she used what her plastic surgeon told her to use…Not to be deterred I said, ‘You don’t look like you’ve had any ..ah- hem…work done!‘ She had an eyelift, but nothing else. Long story short – it wasn’t a product- it was a recipe! Basically a combination of the two oils I have just shown you- Soybean and Olive Oil.

Mix it 2/1 ratio of Soybean to Olive Oil. If you don’t need the Estrogen, use straight Olive Oil. I became a firm believer in her all natural skincare product.  Still, because aging skin doesn’t renew as quickly as it once did- an all natural exfoliant will get you started. Using some information I had garnered from working with skincare- including several ‘all natural’ lines- I came up with this one- straight from the pantry. It is powerful and is not to be used on a daily basis but just to get you started turning over those old dead skin cells!   Here’s my Heavy Duty September Salted Skin Scrub–img_1431

  • 1/4 cup of Mild Pure Olive Oil (this does not have to be an expensive olive oil)
  • 1/4 cup of Soybean Oil
  • 2-3 Tablespoons of Granulated Non-Fat Milk Powder
  • 1 Tablespoon Black Hawaiian Lava Sea Salt- you can use Epsom Salts in place of the Black Sea Salt
  • 1 -2 Tablespoons of Fine Sea Salt
  • Zest of one medium size Lemon and-
  • The Juice of one half of the Lemon

Combine these to make a paste, mine looked gray because of the black lava salt.    img_1435

Blend thoroughly until it has a thick paste texture. Let it sit for a few minutes, while I explain the benefits of the other ingredients beyond the Olive Oil and Soybean Oil-

The coarse natural salts are what make this a heavy duty scrub, not recommended for daily use but to kickstart the turnover of skin cells! Black Sea Salt has a larger grain than the Sea Salt, as does Epsom Salts, if you choose to use that instead. Salts–

  • Exfoliate
  • Bring Moisture to Surface of the Skin
  • Plumps the Skin naturally
  • Kills Bacteria
  • Encourages Skin Regeneration
  • Reduces Inflammation

Lemon zest is where the Essential Oil of the Lemon resides, and it adds another texture to exfoliate- it is powerful stuff!  The Zest and Lemon Juice-

  • Shrink Open Pores
  • Tighten Skin Tissue
  • Increase Skin Elasticity
  • Brighten the Skin
  • Lightens Age Spots
  • Evens Skin Tone
  •  Reduce Fine Lines and Wrinkles.

Granular Powdered Dry Milk is another powerhouse! The texture of the granular dry milk is part of the exfoliant. Milk is another powerful ingredient to use topically, you won’t believe all it can do. Even Cleopatra knew Milk was good for the skin! Here’s what she may not have known, bless her heart! Milk is-

  • A Natural Source of Vitamin D
  • Hydrates and Softens Skin
  • Contains Mild Alpha Hydroxy Acid properties
  • Reduces Appearance of Aging
  • Lightens Age Spots
  • Repairs Sun Damage
  • Complete Protein with Calcium and Potassium
  • Contains all 21 Amino Acids

Alright ladies, start your September Skincare! Here’s the Method:

  • Cleanse the face and neck with a tissue dipped in Olive Oil-
  • Take a small amount of the Heavy Duty Scrub-
  • Starting on the forehead, working down the face, over the nose-
  • Avoiding the delicate tissues around the eyes!
  • Moving across the upper lip and around the mouth, chin and down the neck-
  • Scrub lightly!! Use circular motions- gently scrub
  • Then let the oils absorb into the skin before removing the residue with a Warm Damp Cloth.
  • Your skin will feel tingly and lightly damp.
  • With a clean tissue, apply a fine coating of Olive Oil.

When it absorbs –  you will love the way your skin feels! Refrigerate the excess scrub, it will stay fresh about 3 days. I plan to use it again on the third day and wait another month or so and do it again. Men can also benefit from this all natural scrub! Feel free to use the rest of the scrub when you shower as a body scrub! Now, drink your water, anoint yourself with oil, scrub occasionally – then you won’t look dry. That’s straight from Ponce de Leonetta! As a bonus for those of you have read all of this- Listen to that good ol’ boy who could use a little Heavy Duty Skin Scrub himself….none other than Willie Nelson, singing September Song. It’s a good reminder to take care of ourselves and the ones we love- for the days do really go by from May til September…

Love y’all, Camellia

Fountain of Youth Photograph from http://welcometopattyville.blogspot.com

AOL images for oils – the rest are mine!

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Dyin’ in the South…

 

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The late great Pat Conroy, wrote a cookbook that is one of my all time favorites- he has one chapter called ‘Why Dying Down South is More Fun’. In my collection of local, state and regional cookbooks- they don’t come right out and have chapters devoted to funeral food– but if you’re from the South- well…let’s just say we know that the cooks who offer the submissions have gotten a whole lot of compliments on the dishes they took to comfort those who mourn. We also know which ones don’t comfort- they afflict. You don’t take hot spicy foods like Pit Barbeque- which might conjure up the image of ‘hellfire and damnation’-though the grieving family will graciously accept any and all offerings in the spirit in which they are given. Pat Conroy makes note that when anyone dies in the South, ‘the pigs get nervous’– I would add – ‘the chickens get nervous and stop layin’. Fried chicken shows how much you care, stuffed eggs are always welcome and a baked ham feeds a crowd. Stuffed Eggs are the appropriate term for funeral food– no one in his right mind would dare called them ‘Devilled Eggs’. We prize stuffed eggs so much we have plates with little egg shaped indentions passed down from one generation to the next, I have my grandmother’s white egg plate. 2016-03-23 11.07.00Women have Pyrex dishes with their names inked on masking tape for Dinner on the Ground, Memorial Day and holidays but mostly for funeral food. These glass dishes might be ensconced in a silver holder with little legs or just plain glass- but all are filled with concoctions to die for- they’re so divine. You can count on hearing- ‘Has anyone seen my 9×12 Pyrex dish?’ in the days and weeks to follow a funeral.

In the South, when you don’t know what to say- taking comfort food is the very best thing to do. We hope after the funeral, folks will eat as good or better than at Thanksgiving or Christmas- we don’t want anyone to worry about what to eat, when they are struggling.casseroles-campbells

I try to keep a Bereavement Pound Cake in the freezer- my pound cakes freeze very well due to the high fat content and being wrapped tightly. I’ve never kept one frozen for very long-to have a Pound Cake on hand has truly been a lifesaver…well, a life might have been lost but a ham, a casserole or a pound cake- is comforting, goes a long way and can feed the multitudes.2015-12-21 11.08.39

Mostly teetotalers-we don’t talk about it very much, but we do value the medicinal numbing qualities of strong drink– we might nurse it, we just don’t advertise it. The South has produced the finest beverages in the world- Sweet Tea, Co-Cola, Bourbon, Jack Daniels, Muscadine Wine; even Rum, all of which do bring a nip of comfort to afflicted mourners.

We once attended a memorial service for a local Historian whose specialty was the War between the States. This man wanted his service to be authentic-held in a historic home he knew was being restored. The Committee decided unanimously not to restore the bullet-riddled transom over the door from a little skirmish during the war-ah. The house was opened to honor this man. The Honor Guard was in full regalia worn for ‘re-enactments’ – which to be honest, are exercises in futility since we’re never gonna pull this thing out, but the men seem to enjoy it. The revered Historian wanted to be cremated and his ashes strewn on the closest battlefield- which caused a bit of an rippit from some of the older set, who still think six feet under Alabama Marble is the most dignified way to go.old tombstone- aol images  The Historian’s service was planned down to a tee, the house was spruced up and the wide foyer was set with folding chairs facing a flag draped altar with the urn on top– all ready for the next day. One of the men brought in the big punch bowl to sit on the sideboard- he had obtained the old recipe from 1786 for Chatham Artillery Punch. It has to preserve for two days!  The night before, he offered some of it as solace for the men who had to get things ready for the Historian. The ladies had bought ginger ale to substitute for that whole case of champagne.  It was hot and humid- some of the men thought they would have a toast to their fallen. No one thought the bugle playin’ brother was in such bad shape- he got punch drunk. The day of the service, the ladies like to have died when they found out Brother wasn’t able to play ‘Taps’– some even fumed  they were going to kill the whole regiment! vintage silver punch bowl

One of the revelers brought in a boom box instead of the bugle; the Honor Guard decided that despite the events of the night before- the Historian rightly deserved the whole case of champagne instead of the ginger ale-and unapologetically handed the widow an icy cup of punch to settle her nerves. During the service the widow slowly slid off the horsehair sofa onto the oriental rug. The Chaplin finished up his rather long eulogy. The Honor Guard stood at attention as the static-y ‘Taps’ blared; they filed somberly out of the foyer onto the grounds, while someone discreetly re-seated the grieving widow. Outside, instead of a synchronized 21 gun salute- it sounded like a bunch of firecrackers going off as the antique guns fired away. The mourners were glad they stayed inside and actually lived to die another day.

Now, like all good Southern stories, this one is part myth, part truth and part outright lies– however, to show good faith…If you will be careful when and how you use it- here is the recipe for Chatham Artillery Punch, from the Savannah River House which will no doubt resurface again.ChathamArtilleryPunchRecipe.jpg

However, I would like to make this perfectly clear- Southern Ladies are taught it is coarse and common to drink, chug or slurp. A true lady sips. Coffee, water, tea or something to numb the pain…a lady always holds cups, glasses or plates in a delicate hand with the elbow at  the waistline; and honestly sliding off a sofa is just not done under normal circumstances.

Oh Law, I hope you don’t die laughing, but if you do? Please come South, we’ll take care of you.

Love y’all, Camellia

Find Pat Conroy’s Cookbook on Amazon, Barnes and Noble and other major booksellers!

Product Details

Casket photo is from http://www.bjwinslow.com Other images are either mine or from AOL images, please advise if any copyright applies.

 

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Instinct or Fitness…

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I’m just going to admit it- I’m uncoordinated. I will never be good at sports or exercising. Never have been, do not aspire to it.  First of all, going to a gym without at least some color on my face- blush or lipstick -would be sort of horrifying for me. I would hate to inflict that on anyone. I no longer buy swimsuits. I still call them bathing suits-I do not wear bathing suits so as not to inflict my aging body on the general public.  I can wear a cute cover up and have a fine old time. IMG_1398

The last time I tried exercising in a group publically was in an aerobics class at my church at least 30 years ago- it was a disaster– no really, I am not kidding. The building had indoor/outdoor carpeting. I  had on a cute new outfit with socks and tennis shoes. I stood on the back row of a class of 30 women, just in case. I could not get the steps right, I could not shift several steps to the right and hop, flailing my arms around in the air at the same time. I hopped-scooted over…my tennis shoe caught on the indoor outdoor carpet– I stumbled backwards, trying not to hurt anyone or break their rhythm and ended up flinging myself into a whole wall of metal folding chairs. It was not pretty, it was loud with all of those chairs falling like steel dominoes. The acoustics in that room are pretty good… let’s just say this was not a joyful noise unto the Lord.women exercising dailymail.uk

I have tried to explain being uncoordinated for years- especially when folks tell me about steps and swings and all manner of fitness routines. I cannot risk it.  I’m not proud of this.  I have tried walking on a tread mill more than once and more than once have managed to trip and skid off, machine still rolling.women on treadmills vintage

My husband, a person of considerable athletic skill, has known and accepted my uncoordinated style; since as newlyweds he let me go with him on a run…when we got back he said-

  • ‘How ’bout letting me run by myself from now on?‘
  • ‘Why?’
  • ‘Well your feet flap on the pavement.’ Enough said.

I signed up for golf lessons many years ago…the instructor told me at the end of the first lesson- ‘Ma’am, golf just isn’t your game.’ He didn’t offer to return my money…I didn’t ask either.vintage woman golfing

I really accepted my ineptness early on…when I was in college I was required to have a certain amount of physical education.

  • I took tennis.
  • I knew the rules, I aced the written tests.
  • When my grade came out, it was a glaring ‘B’ –
  • I asked the instructor why he had given me a B-
  •  Graciously he said, ‘You don’t have the Killer Instinct.’

Most Southern folks start planning their funerals when they are in their 40’s if not before…Please believe me, I know this- we have a morbid fascination with the process. It could be argued that dyin’ is more fascinating in the South. When I want my husband to listen to anything I am saying – I just have to say- ‘When I die…’ or ‘I want this played at my funeral.’   He listens up.

Recently I was contemplating an extra roll of fat I had found- it’s none of your business where I found it-I was thinking maybe I should give fitness another chance. I’ve got some important tests coming up- my cholesterol screening and BMI. I thought of all the personal risks involved. To exercise is risky for me.  I have decided that having-

Beloved Wife and Mother

She Never had the Killer Instinct

Carved on my tombstone-is sounding better and better all the time.old tombstone- aol images

Meanwhile, before I start pushing up daisies- I’m keeping close to the ground and digging in my garden…

Love y’all, Camellia

The photograph of the tennis player and the swimmer are from a vintage encyclopedia- called The New Wonder World- last copyright- 1941 by Geo. L. Shuman and Co.

The women on treadmills- attributed to an article by Huffingon Post

The golfer, the group photograph of women exercising and the tombstone from AOL images and may be subject to copyright.